Reflections on a Ten-Year Journey

By Joshua A. Boschee
Staff Writer

I have been pretty nostalgic the past few weeks. Ten years ago, I had just graduated high school and was preparing to attend NDSU. This summer, I have been busy volunteering at new student orientation and planning my ten-year reunion, which takes place next week. To be 18 again, with little responsibility, full of idealistic energy and plans to take on the world, at times seems refreshing.

As class president, I have been responsible for rounding up my classmates and scheduling our ten year reunion. I have been told by more than a few of my classmates that the only reason they elected me class president our senior year was because no one else wanted to be responsible for the reunion.

It has been quite the experience finding up-to-date contact information for each of my classmates. I don’t know how anyone planned a class reunion before the advent of Facebook!

It has been fun though, reconnecting with old friends and hearing about what each person has done with the past ten years of their life. Beyond personal updates, the re-telling of stories filled with shenanigans, falling in love, break ups, trips to the principal’s office and favorite teachers has made organizing the reunion worth it.

Watching all the new students come through orientation with their families has been energizing as it reminds me of when I was 18 and preparing to attend college. There seems to be an aura about them that is a combination of their excitement to be away from home and their anxiety of the impeding independence.

Like many of these students, I spent the summer before my freshman year working a part-time job, hanging out at the lake, staying out late with friends and reminding my parents that I was now an adult. Moving into the residence halls was exciting and I learned to be really good at college life. Well, at least my interpretation of college life. My grade point average that first semester might not have been the best reflection of my academic abilities, but at least I was having fun…right?

While reflecting on these experiences, I continue to ask myself, “How different would things have been if I were out before graduating high school or starting college?” I don’t know the answer to this. I didn’t know one openly gay person when I started college. Now, I see students and young people that are living out and have been since middle school. The summer after graduation and starting college are often dynamic experiences for young, queer people and we see a lot of them come out during this time.

I know the world is much more accepting and tolerant than it was ten years ago, as we
see many more openly gay people on TV, in politics, in church, at our schools and at work than ten years ago. However, there are still many challenges facing young people who are considering whether or not to come out.

Would I have received the leadership and community involvement awards that I did? Would my friends that I had in high school remain my friends? Would I have been kicked out of my Catholic school? Would I have made the friends that I did in college? Would I have been able to join my fraternity? Would I have been selected for the internship that opened the door to my career? Would I have been elected to the number of leadership positions that I held in college? Would my focus on a career have changed? Would my family and friends have been so understanding?

While I have no idea how things could have been different or not by coming out earlier, I do know that I am the person I am today because of all of these experiences. I am a believer that our actions provide opportunities and challenges.

If I had changed even one of those actions, say going left instead of right at one point in my life, the potential alteration to the life I have now could be subtle or drastic. Would I go back and do it differently? I doubt it. We all have our own unique journey and it’s this journey that makes us who we are.

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