Conversations With the “Oil Genie”

By Charlie Barber
Staff Writer

If men were angels, government would not be necessary…A dependence on the people is, no doubt, the primary control on the government, but experience has taught mankind the necessity of auxiliary precautions. -James Madison

Malefactors of great wealth…ruthless and determined men [hiding] behind the breastworks of corporate organization. -Theodore Roosevelt

Government regulators must be held accountable. -Byron Dorgan

Where is Grover Norquist? Where is Duane Sand? I would have thought that with oil gushing into the Gulf of Mexico as a result of a big oil corporation allowed to “drill baby drill” without cautious and stringent regulation, they would be holding news conferences to crow about their triumphs for unhindered private corporations over responsible public government.

Katrina was a natural disaster, made worse by flaws in private and public sectors at all levels, so it would not have been good timing for these twin gurus of “no gummint” to come forth and brag about their ideological contribution to hamstringing of federal efforts through Bush II’s executive incompetence and Congress’s legislative design, detailed in Ivor van Heerden’s “The Storm.”

The BP oil spill, however, is such a manifest triumph of larger and larger corporate greed over smaller and smaller government oversight, that one could at least expect Norquist and Sand to publicly exclaim “well done!”

Not hearing from those geniuses, I decided to consult my local “Oil Genie.” I discovered my Oil Genie while driving to Denver in Summer, 2008. Somewhere between the home of Senator Byron Dorgan in Regent, and the adopted home of President Teddy Roosevelt in Medora, he appeared on the horizon.

As a fan of fantasies set in the Middle East, like “The Thief of Baghdad,” “Hajji Baba,” and “Cheap Oil,” I must have been ruminating on such things…and there he was!

I have consulted him often since then on such things as fossil fuels, global warming, and the mania for deregulation and disdain for responsible government that has caused such havoc in the past generation.

High Plains Reader: Oh Genie, why have obvious advantages of oil drilling in North Dakota’s Bakken been neglected by the private sector and public debate? Drilling there doesn’t release methane as in Alaskan tundra, oil into waters as in the Gulf of Mexico, or our foreign policy into the hands of people who hate us in the oil rich Middle East.

Genie: Idiot. Why should big corporations trouble to design expensive technology to drill horizontally and develop sophisticated water pressure techniques [fracture], when, with much less money they can buy off politicians and media outlets to do the job?

HPR: Oh. But Genie, all that deregulation in the work place and wars, mostly for the sake of oil, have cost precious American lives. Don’t the men and women at the top of the big oil food chain have consciences?

G: Moron. Big oil corporations are bags of money headed by egos. They are not really human in the sense that you use the term. They care nothing for the lives of mere mortals, or birds or wetlands for that matter. These are lost as self-appointed monarchs seek to soar to the heights of unlimited power, while drilling to unlimited depths.

HPR: I see. But Genie, why have Americans taken so long to realize that heads of big oil corporations, and big financiers on Wall Street, never really cared about their fates?

G: Fool. Too many Americans are greedy. Why else would casinos be so loaded? Most Americans want services from government, but don’t want to pay for them. Until they learn once again that there is no such thing as a free lunch.

HPR: What a hope. But, oh Genie, what are the lines between what we need from government, and what we want from the private sector?

G: Now you’re getting somewhere. You need government for things most people can’t do by themselves: local and national security, health care, infrastructure, and education. You especially need government to spend money on things that are important, but won’t make money until they they are in place. Recently, the Mayors of Williston, Stanley and Bowman told Senator Kent Conrad and Congressman Earl Pomeroy about the “housing crisis” in their towns, as reported by the New York Times. Naaah. What these Mayors have is a water and sewer crisis. Their private sectors could easily provide housing without government support, but no public sector infrastructure like water and sewage treatment, means no ability to support viable, long term housing. Local resources in towns like Stanley are exhausted. Governor John Hoeven did nothing. The North Dakota Legislature did nothing. They both sat on a billion dollar surplus, and did nothing. The only hope is from the federal government.

HPR: But, oh Genie, with all the problems that the federal government and President Obama have, will they ever focus on the value of the Bakken for greater U.S. oil independence, and ease the sufferings of good Americans who live there?

G: Sewers, water supply and roads are things that government does well.

HPR: True, but why haven’t the Republican Governor and Legislature in North Dakota done anything, oh Genie?

G: As long as the people of North Dakota continue to vote for them, they don’t have to think about or act on such problems on the Bakken, and certainly not Watford City, or Stanley, Williston and Bowman.

HPR: Thanks for the insights, oh Genie.

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