“To breed, or not to breed: that is the question”.

Q:  Are children expensive? And if so, are they worth it?

We feel like having children, but don’t yet know how we would buy them clothes or diapers?

How do people afford children???

I don’t understand.

I guess you just buy less stuff for your houses, cars, self, others…right? All for baby?

Tell me how it works!!




A:  RJR,

This is the most important decision you will face in your entire life. You are already way ahead of the game by asking the questions before you are pregnant. Good job.

Children are expensive in nearly the same way that cigarette smoking is expensive. You will prioritize them above all other expenses without even realizing you are doing so. Rather than adding to your total bill, you will find that you have stopped buying soy mocha lattes and that you are still as broke as you remember being before baby was born. On the plus side, you will not actually be smoking cigarettes, which is really a pretty silly thing to do, and smokes are not half as fun to twirl around in circles as little boys.

The good news is that you will have a human life to fill up with all of the good things your parents gave you, as well as whatever wisdom you can scrounge from your own meager twenty-some years of experience on this planet. You will be able to rear a child who is capable of critical thinking during a time when critical thinking will be more critical than we seem to think.


The down side is that you are taking an enormous risk by bringing life into a chaotic world, in which you cannot look your infant in the proportionally large eye and say “I will not let you down.”


P.S. RJR - may I use this question and answer for my column?


Posted 5 years, 9 months ago by Lukas Brandon | Email .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) | View Lukas Brandon's profile.

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