By Ed Raymond
27 May 2021
The Pillow Guy Thinks Trump Could Be Back in the Oval Office by August
After listening to Republican representatives at a Congressional hearing insist there was no insurrection at the capitol on January 6, 2021, I believe The Divided States of America is on hospice and will require heavenly resurrection to recover from insurrection.
They testified it was just a bunch of patriotic tourists on a tour of the halls displaying their faith in democracy. “Hang Mike Pence?” “Where’s Nancy?” Never heard it. Zip ties? Bear spray? Confederate flags? MAGA hats? Baseball bats? Body armor? Helmets? Trump flags? Just typical tourist carry-ons and accoutrements.
A Trump zombie is now facing two charges: (1) murdered his wife, (2) committed voter fraud. He mailed in his wife’s ballot after he killed her. That’s against the law. Was she going to vote for Biden? What’s important in this world? This is why the Trumplican zombies are wildly unpredictable about the political future of the Divided States. We could be Egypt, Rome, China, Mongolia, France, and a hundred other failed empires that succumbed to dictators with gold toilets. The evidence continues to pile up in capitols and Mara-a-Loco and there’s Big Trouble in River City because of Big Lies.
As an example of adding to the evidence pile, lots of talk about the Supreme Court putting Donald Trump back in the Oval Office by August took place in the Corn Palace of Mitchell, South Dakota on May 10. Zombies started to line up to get into the Corn Palace seven hours before the doors were opened at 4 p.m. to nighttime hours so they could listen to Trump’s White House buddy My Pillow CEO Mike Lindell. He and other radical conservatives revealed that The Donald won the 2020 election because the Chinese corrupted the counting machines and took 14 million votes away from his Great Leader. Mike predicted that after the Supreme Court examined the evidence the Trumplicans were gathering, the Court would vote 9-0 to put “The Chosen One” behind the Resolute desk again. I bet that made Fox News.
Mike said “evil is overplaying its hand” in our politics. He was playing an important part by “speaking out and spreading the evidence,” raising lots of cash for a “legal offense fund to save the country.” Lindell said he wouldn’t run for dogcatcher if the vote was counted on voting machines because “they are all corrupt.” A crowd of 1,650 attended his “Frank Rally,” which is supposed to represent his social media platform. Each attendee was given an autobiography of Mike and copies of his film “Absolute Proof” that covers all the “fraud” committed in the 2020 election. The major “fraud” was supposed to have been committed by Dominion Co. software that switched millions of votes from Trump to Biden. The software company is suing Mike for $1 billion. That’s a helluva lot of pillows.
Do Republicans Really Believe the Pussy-Grabbing Big Liar?
The Ipsos Poll is conducted by a reputable market research and public opinion firm that employs more than 600 research professionals. It studies economies, technology, financial services, and telecommunications around the world. According to the latest Ipsos Poll, 55% of Republicans believe the 2020 election was “rigged,” 60% believe the election was “stolen,”, and that 63% believe Trump was not to blame for inciting the January 6 insurrection. But who knows what Republicans really believe in? For over 50 years they have said they believe in limited government, low taxes, family values, capitalism, the Bible, the Constitution, the declaration that “all men are created equal,” the tooth fairy, local control (except when they don’t want it), Adam and Eve two genders,, that God will not allow the world to b e destroyed, and that opposing abortion for the last 50 years was a smart political move to garner votes.
The Republican Party is now so busy backing the Big Lie they no longer list what they stand for—except POWER. Getting the evangelicals, fundamentalists, and Opus Dei-type Roman Catholics to back Trump while singing “Onward, Christian Zombies” is emptying Christian pews fast across the land. Living in the Middle Ages is not attractive to Generations X, Y, and Z. Some will reach 2100 AD.
Over the last couple of centuries we have had numerous politicians of both parties from presidents on down who have had problems keeping their zippers zipped. Lately, with the lustful leadership of the Great Pussy-Grabber himself leading the party of family values, there is a preponderance of evidence he is leading other Trumplicans to unzipping , including such notables as Jeff Bezos, Bill Gates, and the Matt Gaetzes of the Congressional world.
This emphasis on making private parts public reminds me of my French sisters who sewed the tapestries prepared for the French and American markets. Most of the tapestries had naked people exposing private parts. As these could not be sold in America, French women cut out the private parts and sewed in flowers to replace them. The 254-room Vanderbilt Mansion has a special room containing tapestries worth millions. Shucks, nothing but flowers. One worker saved all the private parts and sewed them into one quilt which she gave to a friend in America. The owner now wants to sell it for millions to a person who will agree to display the “quilt of a thousand genitals” around the United States. How about donating it to Congress and the White House and display it in the rotunda? It could be the symbol of an empire imploding.
A ‘Final Solution’ for the Second Amendment Guys and the NRA
Over 27 years of publishing a weekly column I have written at least 100 out of the 1,350 about our insane, obscene, and deadly gun culture. From noon Monday on May 10, 2021 to midnight Wednesday the Divided States of America had 355 separate shooting “incidents” taking the lives of 123 and wounding 297 in a 72-hour period. We have had 196 mass shootings so far in 2021, killing 224 and wounding 777 in that category alone. In 2020, firearms killed 44,000 and wounded over 100,000, costing us hundreds of billions of dollars in medical care, funeral costs, and productivity.
The total will probably be much greater this year. The reasons? More guns than people, disaster capitalism, and income inequality.
Even with the National Rifle Association in bankruptcy because CEO Wayne LaPierre, his executives and staff, and the NRA board members have been buying $5,000 suits, $500 shoes and private jetting to Africa, the Bahamas, and other hot spots, spending many millions at first-class resorts around the world, the gun culture still exists in the militias like the Oath Keepers, Three Percenters, Boogaloos, the Michigan militias, the Proud Boys and white nationalist organizations such as the Ku Klux Klan and the Sons of The Confederacy. If you wear an NRA cap and pay its dues, write “sucker” by it.
In the past I have suggested that no civilian should have magazines and clips that hold more than six rounds and that ammo be limited by muzzle velocity and metal types. That’s just a start. We need all kinds of restrictions such as red flag laws, background checks, gun registration, licensing, firearm classes, gun show regulations, and storage laws. But the gun culture has a tight grip on Congress.
In desperation, to get the attention of lawmakers, I now suggest that every black, Latinx, and Asian high school graduate this year be given a Glock pistol with 100 rounds of ammunition and that every black, Latinx, and Asian veteran discharged honorably from the military this year be given an AR-15 with 300 rounds of ammunition--with six-round magazines and clips. of course. Maybe that would get the attention of Congress, and eventually end the exceptional way we lead the world in firearm deaths.
I see the North Dakota gun culture doesn’t care that the F-M area has shootings almost every night now. No doubt we need more “good guys” with more guns to stem the tide. Whatever happened to local control? Governor Burgum: be an actual “visionary wonk” and examine the gun culture in the state. You should have put your glasses on before you signed the zoning bill.
I would suggest that the Fargo City Commission pass an ordinance requiring 8’ by 8’ signs on the boulevard wherever a firearms dealer operates in a residential area. The neighbors should be allowed to write the text. Who wants to buy or rent a house next to a gun dealer? Will neighborhood property values go up or down? Is the legislature establishing Second Amendment “Sanctuary” zones?
The Military Is Loaded with Sons and Daughters of the Confederacy
We are slipping off the knife’s edge of losing our democracy and resuming the uncivil Civil War. The evidence is piling up. When Tricky Dick Nixon decided to end the military draft and “volunteer” our poor to fight our wars because of Vietnam War protests by the young with draft numbers, he won votes in the middle and elite classes.
Our “volunteers” come mainly from the poorest counties in the South and West. Most of our “volunteer” military comes out of the South because it’s one way to get out of poverty and the social and environmental mess they live in. With the GI Bill it’s one way to get an education without going into debt for half a lifetime. We presently have a military of 1.33 million composed of 57% White, 16% Black, 16% Latinx, 4% Asian, and 6% “other.” Our actual population is 61% White, 13% Black, 18% Latinx, and 7% other.
I suggest you read Clint Smith’s article in The Atlantic titled “The War On Nostalgia” which points out how The Sons of the Confederacy is still fighting the Civil War. They have fought North democracy for over 150 years by imposing Jim Crow laws and voting laws that affect everybody in the country. They have been building memorials and statues and monuments to the Confederacy for over a century. There has been much publicity about the removal of 160 monuments in 2020 at the request of Blacks. Well, there are only 1,840 left.
White supremacy is alive and well in the South and West. The Sons celebrate what is called “The Lost Cause,” proclaiming that the Civil War was fought by honorable men protecting their communities, and not about slavery at all. Many still believe a statement made by a Southern prisoner to a Union soldier printed in a Louisville newspaper during the war: “You Yanks want us to marry our daughters to n-----s. We have to fight so we never see the day when a negro is put on an equality with a white person.” That attitude is kept alive by the Sons of the Confederacy and white supremacists.
Recently, 120 retired U.S. generals and admirals published an open letter stating Biden had stolen the election and that he is mentally unfit for office. Remember: January 6 was the first time the Confederate flag was marched through the capitol. If America is not in hospice, it is close to terminal and may receive the last rights.
To Joe Biden: playing patty-cake with Mitch will get the Democrats a seat -- at home.
Reviving Rural Grocery Stores in North DakotaBy Annie PrafckeFargo, ND – On October 7th, Gov. Doug Burgum awarded Milnor Market and the Forman grocery store project Main Street Awards, as part of an initiative led by the Office…
by Sabrina Hornung
by Greg Carlsongregcarlson1@gmail.com17 June 2021Edgar Wright -- the subject of his own cult of fandom -- knows a thing or two about obsessive devotion to odds and ends of pop culture. And with “The Sparks Brothers,” the…
by Kris Gruberperriex1@gmail.com17 June 2021Along with lemonade and hotdogs, words and images marking the pavement are synonymous with summer. The accessibility of sidewalk art is appealing, but there is something to be said for…
by HPR Contributor
by Kris Gruberperriex1@gmail.comAdam Quesnell's last show at The Cellar beneath the Front Street Taproom in Fargo was in early September of 2018. He was embarking on a seminal move from Minneapolis to LA. As always, his comedy was…
by Sabrina Hornung
By Kris Gruberperriex1@gmail.comSpring is here (mostly), and our area is buzzing with people eager to get back out and about -- many newly vaccinated and feeling a bit safer. Partnering with Jade Events, Fargo Brewing is just…
by Sabrina Hornung
By Sabrina Hornungsabrina@hpr1.com17 June 2021The Astronaut Scholarship Foundation (ASF) will be providing 60 college students from 44 colleges across America with up to almost $900,000. The 2021 Class of Astronaut Scholars will be…
by Annie Prafckesubmit@hpr1.com17 June 2021On June 19th, from 12pm to 7pm, nonprofit Faith4Hope Scholarship Fund is hosting their first ever Juneteenth Freedom Celebration at Lindenwood Park in Fargo. It is free and open to the…